


A Very Merry Unbirthday

by Gohandinhand



Series: All in the Golden Afternoon [5]
Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: (who aren't really babies in this one but alas we have the label), Bechloe babies, Domestic Fluff, F/F, Family Fluff, Gen, Kid Fic, Kid Fluff - Freeform, Mixed Media, More like 'kids are fun but also TERRIBLE and this is the reality' fluff, Not sugar sweet fluff though, Once again this fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-19
Updated: 2016-05-19
Packaged: 2018-06-09 09:03:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6899707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gohandinhand/pseuds/Gohandinhand
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Listen, kids are great and maybe even the best but they are also gross weirdos figuring out how to be human beings through trial and error. </p>
<p>or</p>
<p>15 tweets Beca sends from vacation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Very Merry Unbirthday

**Author's Note:**

> This took me six months and I'm _sorry_ , but hey it's finally done!  
> As always, credit to PinkCanary for being my sounding board and favoritest beta. I would not have ever pulled this together without her! Credit for the tweeting idea is all hers!

__

“Okay, so - don’t freak out, everybody is _fine_ , but…”

Despite having had a pretty good day, being greeted at the door by her wife with those words and a slightly guilty look gave Beca a strong feeling her day was about to go downhill pretty fast.

“Mommy! Mom’s home!” Chloe’s explanation was cut off by the high-pitched squeal of her oldest daughter, the sight of Alice whipping around the corner towards her following a scant few seconds after.

“Hey, Al. How are you doing?” Beca asks, squatting down to give Alice a hug. Alice flings herself forward, nuzzling into Beca’s grasp and Beca takes the opportunity to discretely check her over.

“I’m fine, mom!” Alice giggles as the slide of Beca’s fingers down her side verges on tickling. She leans forward, breathing into Beca’s ear as if she’s telling a secret. “Penny’s in trouble though,” she confides, and as if summoned, Beca catches sight of a flash of bright red hair crashing into Chloe’s knees.

“Hi, Penny,” Beca grins, and Chloe shoots her an exasperated look.

“C’mere, baby,” Chloe grunts, hauling Penny up into her arms. “Show mom your handiwork.” Penny grins a familiar sly grin at Beca through the frame of her curls -

Wait.

“Oh my god,” Beca says faintly. “Her _hair?!”_

“Apparently, Penny has learned where we keep the scissors,” Chloe says, sounding faintly amused despite herself.

“I’m pretty!” Penny squeals excitedly, and Beca blinks rapidly. Penny’s curls - her beautiful red curls that had taken _forever_ to grow - had been hacked off at the front a couple of inches above Penny’s scalp, the remnants now sticking out like straw from a scarecrow.

“Maybe in some lights, kid,” Beca says dryly, ruffling the remains of Penny’s hair with one hand as the shock passes.

“Beca,” Chloe mutters warningly as she lowers a wriggling Penny back to the ground, and Beca just grins irrepressibly at her.

“What? She doesn’t even know what that means,” Beca says, gesturing towards where Penny and Alice have already run off to fight over their toys again, then finally leaning in to give Chloe a quick peck in greeting. “Besides that, did everything go okay today?”

“Yeah, it’s been okay as long as I have eyes on them,” Chloe snorts. “I started packing their suitcases, but that’s when Penny found the scissors, so we’ll have to finish tomorrow - “

“Oh, my god. Fuck. Chloe, we’re going to Disneyland in two days. Her _hair!”_

“I know,” Chloe grimaces. “I’m going to see if someone can fit her in tomorrow to see if there’s any possible way to make it better, but with how short she cut it I doubt it’s salvageable.”

“Well, that’s going to make for some great pictures.”

“At least it’ll be memorable?” Chloe shrugs.

“We’ve got to make her wear Mickey ears the _whole_ time, babe.”

 

_ _

Chloe’s prediction turns out to be unfortunately true. Beca even called in a favor from her stylist, who could work wonders when grooming Beca for an awards show - but hacked-off three-year-old hair was another matter entirely. Kate tried her best to even it out into some semblance of bangs, and if Beca squinted right it looked better than it had, at least. Kate apologized as they left.

“No, thank you for trying.” Beca sighs. Penny’s impish grin is irrepressible, and she sticks her tongue out to blow raspberries at Beca as she straps her into her car seat. If the Disneyland trip wasn’t a surprise they hadn’t told the girls about yet, this mischievous act of Penny’s would have Beca little suspicious that the whole hair ordeal was really some elaborate plan of Penny’s to obtain a buttload of extra disney souvenirs to cover it up.

Okay, so she already _is_ a little suspicious. Penny is a sneaky little bugger.

“Cut it out, Penelope,” Beca sighs, and Penny wrinkles her nose in silent protest as she complies. “Thank you for listening. You want a moose hat?”

“What?” Penny asks, thrown by Beca’s sudden shift.

“Moose hat!” Beca holds it out - a brown fuzzy thing, with massive ears and antlers on top, and of course Penny _loves_ it. She pulls it on her head immediately and grins at Beca, who reaches out to straighten it before looking at it consideringly. “Awesome. Because we have to go pick up Alice from school, and somehow that is an improvement.”

 

__

The drive from their house to Disneyland is a little over an hour - so as much as twice that in LA traffic, Beca knows. She sneaks the suitcases into the car while Chloe distracts the girls with arts and crafts. They don’t tell the girls where they’re going until everyone is loaded in the car and they’ve started down the road - of course this is the point that Beca notices Penny has glitter all over her left cheek.

“We’re going on a special trip!” Chloe announces, twisting around in the passenger seat a bit to look back at the kids. “Does anyone have any guesses about where we’re going?”

“Aunt Stacie’s office!” Alice immediately announces, and Beca jerks her gaze to the rearview mirror to stare into the back seat, more than a little thrown.

“What? No! Why would you think we’re going to Aunt Stacie’s office?!” Beca yelps.

“Aaaaaww. We wanted to see the baginas again,’ Penny pouts.

“What?! Again? When did you go before?” Beca questions, and Chloe snorts guiltily.

“I had to drop something off for her the other weekend when you got called in for that ‘emergency’, remember?” Beca groans, remembering the weekend in question. “The girls really liked all the anatomical models she had. We should think about getting them some,” Chloe says thoughtfully.

“Oh my god, we are not getting them model vaginas, Chloe!”

“Well no, but there are other ones that would be good. We’ll talk about it,” Chloe finishes, leaning over to press a kiss to Beca’s cheek.

“I know! We’re going to the garbage dump!” Penny interrupts, and Chloe turns around in her seat again.

“Um, no. We are not going to the garbage dump. Why are you so obsessed with trash?” Chloe asks, a familiar refrain, and Penny shrugs.

The girls throw out a few more wild guesses - the zoo, Chuck E Cheese, Taylor Swift’s house - before Chloe interrupts to ask if they want a hint.

“Yes!” They screech in unison - although not even close to in tune - and Beca cringes. Chloe pulls a pair of Mickey ears out from the pile by her feet, a looping “Alice” written along the back. Chloe had insisted on pre-ordering personalized Mickey ears for everyone, and while technically Beca hadn’t yet agreed to wearing hers, she knew she’d lose the second the force of three pairs of bright blue puppy dog eyes were turned on her.

She’d hold out as long as she could, though.

Chloe holds the hat out so the girls can both see it, and they stare at it, puzzled.

“We’re going to… A mouse farm?” Alice finally asks hesitantly, and Beca fails at holding in her amused snort.

“Oh my god, just tell them,” she laughs at Chloe. “Our children are such disappointments,” she jokes, shooting a smile and a wink at Alice in the mirror, who immediately grins back at her.

“Okay. We are going to..” Chloe pauses dramatically, and Beca hears Penny kick the back seat in impatience. “Disneyland!” Chloe finally announces, and the word is barely out of her mouth before Alice is gasping dramatically.

“Oh my gosh!” She squeals, and Alice is usually Beca’s mini-me but she has never sounded like Chloe more than she does in that moment. “Ohmygod, Penny, Disneyland is where the princesses live! Will we get to see Anna and Elsa?” Alice immediately questions, because _of course she does._ Chloe nods, bright smile practically pasted to her face, and a set of twin squeals make Beca grimace.

In the end, Beca really regrets letting Chloe start the surprise reveal so soon after departing from the house. They hit stop and go traffic and in the end the trip takes just under two hours, and by the time they pull up to the resort she's not sure her ears aren't bleeding from all the excited screeching. Beca is relieved to leave the girls with Chloe to wrangle for a few minutes while she gets them checked in and give her eardrums a break.

Just for a few minutes, as it turns out, because the second they get into the hotel room the squealing starts again, and Beca is amazed that human beings can actually emit sounds in that register. They booked a room with a bunk bed for the kids, and this is apparently one of the most exciting things Alice has ever been witness to, never mind the fact that you can _literally see Disneyland from their window._ Penny follows Alice’s lead, the typical little sister M.O., and matches her excitement level even though the likelihood is that Beca’s going to wake up at 2am to a foot planted in her ribs when Penny crawls into bed with them as usual. Beca nabs Penny from where she’s started scaling the ladder, and holds her madly giggling daughter upside down in front of her.

“Nuh uh, Penny. Top bunk is for Alice,” Beca says, then playfully tosses Penny onto her and Chloe’s queen bed.

“The last thing we need is for you to go flying from the top bunk trying to imitate Supergirl,” Chloe chimes in, and Beca groans.

“Okay, now you’re giving her ideas,” Beca accuses, and Chloe stops rifling through a suitcase long enough to toss a piece of clothing at Beca’s head. Beca dodges it, smirking at Chloe, then does a double take before plucking it off the floor. “What the hell is this?” she asks warily, and now Chloe is the one smirking.

“Matching shirts,” Chloe says, and Beca stares wide-eyed at the tiny pink shirt with mickey ears donning a giant hairbow made out of _glitter._

“You have lost your mind.”

“You don’t like it?” Chloe pouts, and Beca is - stunned, honestly, her mouth gaping open.

“We’re getting a divorce,” is what she finally manages to force out of her mouth, and Chloe breaks, laughing hard enough she has to grab onto the dresser in front of her for support.

“Chill, Becs. The shirts are just for the girls.” Beca’s relieved, but not enough to be distracted, because -

“How much shiiii-stuff did you buy for this trip, Chloe?” she asks, incredulous, and Chloe taps her nose knowingly.

“That is for me to know and you to find out. No but really, those have a purpose - there are going to be crowds and I’m hoping it’ll be easier to spot any runaways” - Chloe tips her head pointedly at where Penny is now trying to hang from the underside of the top bunk - “if they’re in neon pink.”

 

_ _

Beca concedes - it _was_ good foresight on Chloe’s part - and they manage to wrangle their over-excited children long enough to get them dressed to hit Downtown Disney for dinner.

Dinner, and of course, more shopping. Beca would expect nothing less out of her wife and the two small children being encouraged by said wife. They make it out of the World of Disney store with a few more accessories, several toys, a princess tea set, a charm bracelet for Chloe, and four more stuffed animals which are the only things Beca is actually annoyed about, despite how excited the girls are. Small children - or at least hers - have a tendency to collect stuffed animals at an unbelievable rate, which proceed to do absolutely nothing but clutter up every available bit of free space while the girls ignore their existence. She resolves to “disappear” at least four other stuffed animals from the house when they got home to prevent the stuffie population from breeding like bunnies, but she can’t stew about it for too long. Beca was quickly distracted by her own prize, an actual functional BB-8 robot that Chloe spotted for her. When they get back to the hotel room, she had to quash the urge to tear open her new toy like... well, like her five year old was doing, and help prod the girls into getting ready for bed.

 

__

Having the girls bathed, into pajamas, teeth brushed, and tucked into bed just a few minutes later than their normal bedtime feels nothing short of miraculous. They’re hopped up on sugar from the candy store they stopped in on the way back to the hotel and literally more excited than Beca has ever seen them, full of anticipation for their foray into the actual park the following morning. Beca had fully expected them to resist bedtime with the practically santa-level excitement they’d been experiencing, but apparently it had also served to wear them out enough to quickly pass out in the unfamiliar beds. Go figure.

And, well - Beca and Chloe are sharing a room with their children for the next couple of nights, which as it turns out is about as fun as it sounds. They’re going to venture into the park _early_  in the morning, so she and Chloe set out the things they’ll need for the next day before climbing into bed themselves.

“It’s barely 9pm,” Beca whispers to Chloe. “What the fuck, we said we were never going to be those people, Chloe.”

“First off, _you_ said that, I never agreed. Second, take a moment to picture how early you’re going to be dragged out of bed to go walk around for hours and hours and then try tell me you don’t want to go to sleep now.”

“You know, it’d be nice if you could be wrong more of the time,” Beca says a little grumpily. She can feel Chloe’s smile from where her face is nestled into her chest, the rest of her body a gentle curve around Beca’s. They fall asleep like that, Chloe breathing steady puffs into Beca’s neck, at least until a certain and very insistent child worms her way in between them to throw her limbs across both of her mothers before passing back out.

 

_ _

As expected, the girls are up before the sun, and the battle to keep two very, _very_ excited children quiet so as to not disturb the other guests until a decent hour is not one Beca wants to repeat again.

Except, you know, they get to repeat it tomorrow. _Yay_.

Everybody is fed, dressed, and yes, even wearing their matching Mickey ears - Beca had folded to Alice’s wobbly lip - to join the small crowd by the gates by six forty. The park doesn’t officially open until eight, but Disney resorts guests are allowed in an hour early, and there was no way in hell they weren’t going to take advantage of that. The front of the park is decorated with massive pumpkin Mickeys, and Halloween decorations are _everywhere_. Even Beca admits it’s pretty cool, and their miniature halloween junkies are thrilled.

Once the rope drops and they enter the park, their first stop is at the oh-so-exciting Lost Children center, to label and plaster a just-in-case sticker to Alice and to Penny in particular.

They’re realistic about their children, okay.

Chloe has to readjust Penny’s hat to tuck her hacked-off hair beneath it - for the first time of many that day, Beca’s sure - before they take off for the actual fun. They head straight down Main street towards Fantasyland, and Beca steals herself for squeals - or possibly shrieks - when the castle comes into view, but she’s surprised. Both girls stop in their tracks, wide eyed and unusually _silent,_ staring in awe at the massive structure.

“Mama, that’s a _castle,”_ Alice says quietly, turning that starstruck look to Chloe, and Chloe grins broadly, clearly delighting in the girls’ reactions.

“Yes, baby. That’s Sleeping Beauty’s castle.” There’s a gasp, and then Beca feels something on her leg. She looks down to find that Penny has apparently been so overcome with wonder at seeing an “actual” castle that she’s using Beca’s leg to hold herself up.

Clearly Penny didn’t inherit Chloe’s penchant for drama _at all_.

Chloe has to take a picture of them in front of the castle, of course - Beca’s actually impressed, because being up at this ungodly hour means that there’s basically no crowd. They actually get a picture of their kids, adorably dressed in matching outfits and personalized Mickey ears, without any sweaty balding guys photobombing in the background. With that accomplished, they take off on a path to the right - it’s the easiest way to get to the Alice in Wonderland ride, which all three of her girls had _insisted_ on riding first, as the only namesake in the park. She can’t wait to watch the girls lose their minds in excitement later when they learn that they actually get to walk inside the castle.

There’s no wait at the ride - the whole point of the “extra magic hour” was to take advantage of the very limited crowd to hit the more popular rides without having to wait in line for an hour - so they hop on immediately. To be honest, Beca thinks Alice in Wonderland is a little freaky - although she obviously now can’t admit this to Chloe, and she find Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory _far_ creepier - but she enjoys the experience regardless. She can literally see Penny and Alice both bouncing excitedly throughout the ride, Chloe keeping one restraining arm on Penny just in case. From next to her, Alice sighs in sadness when the ride exits the first tunnel and she thinks it’s over; when they enter the tunnel again, Beca glances down and can clearly make out her wide grin in the technicolored lights.

After that, of _course_ it’s off to the Mad Tea Party ride. It’s far too early in the morning for Beca’s stomach to be okay with all the spinning, and she begs off after the first ride, but Chloe takes Alice and Penny through two more times. Beca snorts to herself as she waits for them, clearly able to hear Penny’s distinctive (and somewhat maniacal) laughter from where she’s sitting on a bench near the ride. When they stumble out of the teacups after the last round, Chloe’s legs are a little wobbly, and Beca decides not to make fun of her as thanks for Chloe taking that hit for the both of them.

She’s a nice person, okay?

Dumbo’s open right down the street, and while they wait for the current ride to finish Beca eyes Chloe thoughtfully. Heights are not Chloe’s favorite thing, and while a ride that allows two year olds isn’t exactly scary, the open sides of the elephant structure aren’t the most reassuring thing.

“Chlo, would you be more freaked out about sitting next to and worrying about restraining a spastic three year old, or about _not_ sitting next to her and having to worry from afar?”

“Oh god, no, you can take her,” Chloe replies without a second of hesitation. “Alice, are you going to protect me?” Chloe jokes to their five year old - but there’s a note of true distress underlying the joke, and Alice can pick up on that almost as well as Beca can now.

“It’s okay, mama. Do you need me to hold your hand?” Alice says sweetly, and Beca has to suppress the urge to melt into a puddle right there.

“I would appreciate that very much, Ali,” Chloe says, offering her hand, and Beca doesn’t see them let go until their group is walking away from the ride. Beca feels a swell of affection and pride, so pleased to see the kind of person her older daughter is already becoming. Of course, how could she be anything less than exceedingly empathetic, with Chloe’s example to follow?

Oh, god. Beca shakes her head, earning a questioning look from Chloe that she waves off. Disneyland is clearly already making her disgustingly sappy.

Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride is open right across the way and she and Chloe decide they might as well ride, despite none of them knowing the story. That turns out to be a mistake, because the ride is pretty scary, and even the normally unflappable Penny seems a little shaken up by the time it ends. She and Alice perk up at the mention of a Finding Nemo ride, though - Alice is obsessed with sea creatures lately, and she’s immediately sold on the description of an “underwater adventure.” It’s a long ride, but she sits through it patiently, completely enthralled watching the story play out. Penny, on the other hand, is extra wriggly, and it’s only when the ride is done and Penny starts loudly complaining about the lack of shark chase that they realize why.

Beca steers them carefully around the long way out of Tomorrowland to avoid the other two rides that are open - one a faster, space-themed version of the Dumbo ride that they’re skipping right now for Chloe’s sake, and another spinning ride they’re avoiding for hers. They cut through Fantasyland again, and this time she and Chloe share a knowing look as they steer the girls directly towards the castle. Alice and Penny’s reaction is exactly what she anticipated, although Beca herself is pretty underwhelmed by basically walking through a decorated tunnel.

Chloe pulls them down into Pixie Hollow when they get through the castle, and there the girls get their first interaction with actual characters. Tinkerbell is there, along with a few other fairies, and despite not really being into the Tinkerbell stories, the girls are both practically vibrating with excitement. These people are - well, they’re really, _really_ in character, and Beca can already feel a rising struggle to resist bursting in laughter in their faces. She’s know they’re just doing their jobs, and her kids have clearly been roped into the “magic”, but she’s starting to get affected by secondhand embarrassment.

Chloe can clearly sense this, and she sidles up next to Beca, taking her arm and leaning her head onto Beca’s shoulder in what she thinks is an affectionate gesture. As it turns out, Chloe just wanted to preemptively admonish her.

“Please don’t do anything weird and ruin this for our precious spawn,” she murmurs into Beca’s ear, and Beca grouchily waves a hand.

“I won’t, but oh my god, I didn’t think I would ever see anything so extreme as your level of chirpiness at that first activities fair.”

Chloe hip checks her, laughing, and then suddenly it’s their turn and Alice and Penny are - well, Alice is walking slowly towards Tinkerbell, clearly a bit shy, while Penny full-on sprints to go give her a hug. Alice hangs back, warming up to the situation, while Penny talks animatedly to the character, telling her god knows what. Tinkerbell coaxes Alice into joining in, and Beca hears another snap as Chloe’s camera captures Alice getting her first bona fide Disney hug.

They hit the cappuccino cart on Main street after that, because Beca _needs_ it, and they may as well get a little snack now. It’s late enough that the park is officially open, and the crowds are starting to grow. Their morning has already been such a rush, trying to squeeze in the most popular rides, that it’s nice now to slow down and just take everything in.

 

_ _

They wander back to Toontown, which as it turns out is great for burning some excess energy. There’s some big attractions - a playhouse, a treehouse - that the girls just get to wander through and interact with on their own, and it occupies them for a good while before Minnie Mouse shows up. They get to meet Mickey and Goofy too, although to be honest none of the kids appear to be that into the original characters - the parents all seem to be more excited.

Beca categorically refuses to pose for pictures with any of the characters. Chloe only pouts for a minute before Beca is drafted into being the picture taker while Chloe proceeds to hug _everybody_ , Penny following her lead. Alice glances over at Beca once or twice with an incredulous expression as she watches the redheads charm everyone, and Beca completely gets the sentiment. Sometimes Chloe’s - and now Penny’s - ease with everyone they meet is a little unnerving.

They finally leave Toontown, which means they have to exit through Fantasyland yet again, and somehow this is when Penny notices the trash cans for the first time. She is thrilled about the differently themed receptacles and insists on taking a picture with each one they come across. _The_ _trash cans._

“I am definitely never going to understand three year olds,” Beca complains as Penny poses in front of a trash can with Jiminy Cricket on it.

“We’re not meant to,” Chloe says cheerfully as she lets an excited Penny throw her coffee cup into the recycling bin. “But on the plus side, we’ll be able to put together an album of dozens of pictures of Penny posing with trash cans to embarrass her with when she’s a teenager.”

“...Yeah, that’s probably worth it.”

 

It turns out Chloe’s intricately detailed plan to use the early morning hour was more useful than Beca anticipated. She hadn’t been to Disneyland since she was a child herself, and she’d forgotten how much time was spent waiting around in lines. Chloe watches the kids clamber all over the massive treehouse from Tarzan while Beca goes to get in line for the jungle cruise ride, and they end up having to entertain Alice and Penny in their place in line for twenty minutes anyway. Even the carousel - _because those aren’t available everywhere, obviously_ \- has a wait, and oddly the girls _love_ it, forcing them to wait in line for a second go.

They follow Alice and Penny’s whims that way for a few hours, although Beca demands they stop for some Dole Whip after the jungle ride. They have no lunch reservations today so they hit a few random places for food and honestly, Beca doesn’t even give a crap when the girls end up eating mostly ice cream for lunch. She herself opts for one of the massive turkey legs that Chloe _insists_ is bigger than Beca’s head, and Beca can’t evaluate that herself but she refuses to believe Chloe on principle. She ends up sharing a few bites with the kids, although she categorically denies that she can’t finish it herself and insists it’s just so they have something that isn’t ice cream in their stomachs.

Amusingly, Chloe gets recognized before Beca does. A couple of kids she’d taught the year before run screaming up to her in Tomorrowland, and Beca creeps away to show Penny and Alice the Iron Man exhibit while Chloe gets caught up in chatting with the family. When a couple of teenage girls excitedly wave Beca over and asked for an autograph and a picture together a little while later, Chloe flashes a triumphant grin before ducking into a ride without her.

They remain surprisingly undisturbed, those encounters aside, and Beca is very, very thankful for that when Penny starts _losing her everloving mind_ early in the afternoon because that really does not need an audience.

“Uh,” Beca says, and then has to cut herself off to stop Penny from doing some sort of alligator death-roll into another tourist’s legs.

“Sorry!” Chloe calls out, her cheeks flushed almost as red as her hair. Her eyes meet Beca’s - both outrageously wide, because while Penny has never (never) been an _easy_ child, she also doesn’t normally spend twelve full minutes of her day screaming and thrashing on the ground.

“This isn’t going to stop, is it?” Beca finally observes, and Chloe shrugs.

“I thought so, but apparently not? I didn’t know she had such strong feelings about Sofia the First. Has she even _seen_ it? Did she watch it with you?” Beca shakes her head and then narrows her eyes as she watches the three year old.

“Right. Well. _I_ am tired,” she announces in an artificially loud and upbeat voice. “I’m going to go cool down in our awesome hotel room and I would like a cuddle buddy. Who will it be?” Penny’s shrieks continue unabated, and Beca sighs. “Thank you for volunteering, Penelope.” She scoops Penny up in one move, pinning her legs to the side so Penny can’t kick at her in her rage, and Beca quirks an eyebrow at Chloe. “You good with having some Alice-time? We’ll be back in a little while,” Beca assures the duo. “No meeting any namesakes without me, got it?” ”

Chloe nods her assent and gives Beca a quick kiss goodbye, dodging Penny’s flailing arm expertly, and Beca tries her best to blow a kiss towards Alice, who has been watching Penny’s spectacle with wide eyes.

 

She hauls Penny back to their hotel room - ever so thankful that they chose to stay in an on-site hotel and the trip back is short - and Penny has quieted and drooped into Beca’s neck by the time they make it into the lobby. She struggles a bit to pull her key card out and get the door open without jostling Penny, relieved when she gets it open without dropping any of the things she’s juggling. She’s well practiced in doing things with one hand - has been since Alice was born - but it’s gotten significantly harder to balance a child in the other hand as they’ve gotten bigger. She drapes Penny across her and Chloe’s bed, and Penny’s eyes follow her drowsily around the room as she putters about with her stuff before they drift closed. Beca hadn’t really _intended_ to sleep herself, just for Penny to get some shut-eye, but it was a _really_ early morning and, before she really knows what’s happening, she finds herself climbing into the bed as well. She pulls Penny into her, and drifts off quickly to the feel of warm breaths puffing rhythmically across her collarbone.

 

She rouses an hour and a half later to - of course - Penny’s elbow in her gut. She groans and pulls her eyes open, only to find Penny staring at her from about an inch and a half away from her face.

“Mommy! Can we go see ‘Punzel now?” she chirps, and Beca groans again, moving Penny to the side so she can rub her eyes.

“Um. We’ve gotta go find Mama and Alice and then we can decide what to do together, okay?”

“But mama says we can see ‘Punzel!” She grins, and Beca squints at her groggily.

“When did she say that, Penny? Mama isn’t here.”

“No, but she called me,” Penny says solemnly, and Beca’s eyes widen.

“What? Where’s my phone?” Penny holds it out to Beca from where she’d secreted it against her side, and from the speaker Beca can just make out the tinny sound of Chloe’s voice calling out for her.

“Sorry, babe,” Beca grunts into the phone. “Penny jacked my phone again.”

“Yeah, I noticed,” Chloe laughs. “She sounds much more pleasant at least, although you’re sounding a little rough.”

“I didn’t mean to actually fall asleep,” Beca mutters, still rubbing the sleep from her eyes. “Penny does seem… recovered, though.”

“Mmmm. And really into Rapunzel all of a sudden?”

“Yeah, apparently,” Beca replies, watching Penny stare at her pleadingly with huge puppy dog eyes. “That sounds okay?”

They make plans to rendezvous by the meet and greet and Beca freshens up quickly before leading Penny - who literally skips the whole way - back into the park.

 

Beca is thankful for the nap later - for her and Penny - because they decide to stay for the parade which doesn’t even start until fifteen minutes after the girls’ normal bedtime. They’re both _wired_ , probably from both sleep deprivation and the excitement and unusual sights surrounding them. They had planned to hit California Adventure extra early the following morning, but as she and Chloe carry the two drowsy girls into their hotel room at 9:30, Beca is really not going to mind if they happen to sleep in a little the next morning.

 

_ _

Beca’s not sure if 6:30 really counts as “sleeping in”, but they find themselves standing at the gate right by their hotel at 7:40 the next morning regardless. The Ariel ride is _right there_ , and both kids are practically salivating to get inside. They end up riding it literally five times in a row, and Beca is ready to _strangle that fucking seagull_ by the time Chloe lures them off the ride and - of course they end up at the Ariel carousel.

Fucking carousels.

There is only one thing firmly scheduled for the whole trip, and it isn’t until afternoon, so they wander for the next few hours. The girls are less taken with the stories that make up most of the California Adventure rides, but they certainly find enough to entertain themselves. Beca and Chloe have to firmly steer the kids away from the Bug’s Life splash pad because the last thing they need is two bedraggling children whining about being wet and uncomfortable for the next few hours. Even Penny listens gracefully enough, although _wow_ has she got the art of the pout down pat. Beca rolls her eyes and looks pointedly at Chloe, who just grins in response.

(Chloe’s parents had been out to visit just the month previous and Elizabeth, observing Penny’s quirks with wide eyes, had laughed hard enough to fall off the couch before informing Chloe that she was finally getting her payback for what she’d put them through as a child.

“But why do I have to pay for it?” Beca had complained, and yelped when Chloe pinched her arm.)

They end up waiting in line for ages to finally meet Anna and Elsa, although Beca knows the wait isn’t nearly as bad as it could be. The girls are decked out in full Frozen gear today - Alice isn’t donning a blonde wig, because _screw that_ , but Penny’s natural hair color is suited to her own role perfectly and Beca can see the actresses’ eyes light up at the sight of the matching duo. They play along, referring to Alice and Penny as Elsa and Anna, and you can actually see the girls’ absolute enthrallment and wonder as they preen under the attention. Despite herself, Beca feels herself grinning widely and even melting a bit, because this right here is the reason they’d decided to take on the hassle of the mini vacation.

Well, this and one more itty bitty thing.

 

_ _

“Now, you two have to be on your _best_ behavior, because we have a surprise for today,” Beca says seriously.

“It’s a special belated birthday present for you both,” Chloe adds, and Penny just stares at Chloe with a blank face while Alice’s wrinkles in confusion.

“What’s a fellated birthday?” she asks, and Beca _does not laugh_ and does not acknowledge the exasperated look Chloe sends her way.

“No, baby. BE-lated. It means late. So it’s a present that you get after your birthday.”

“Well you could just say late then,” Alice points out, and Beca snorts out another laugh.

“Okay, come here you rascal,” she grunts, grabbing Alice and pulling her in to tickle her mercilessly.

It takes a few minutes to restore order, but finally everyone - including Beca, with a quelling glare from Chloe - has settled down again.

“So would you like to hear the surprise?” she asks with one perfectly arched eyebrow, and both kids nod eagerly.

“Weeeeelll,” Chloe drawls, trying to draw out the suspense again, and Beca has to pinch her arm to get her to just get _on_ with it already. “Fine, fine! We are going to that restaurant over there” - Chloe points - “to have lunch with some of the princesses.”

As expected, chaos erupts again after that, and it takes a few minutes to get everything settled down once more before they make their way over to the restaurant. Alice and Penny are alternating between bouncing with excitement and peppering them with questions, and even the news that the princesses will just be visiting, not actually sitting down and eating with them, doesn’t deflate their excitement any.  

It seems like forever before they actually make it inside and are seated at a table, but the girls are quickly distracted with decorating the crowns and coloring book provided to them, and Beca sinks into her chair with a groan. She had geared herself up for this trip, but she didn’t expect it to seem so much like a freaking workout. Chloe laughs at her, the in-shape _freak_ , and Beca sticks her tongue out just as a waiter comes by. He stifles his laugh, but she can see his mouth twitching in amusement. Beca supposes that normally the childish antics come from the actual children, but - the atmosphere is affecting, that’s the excuse she’s sticking with.

 

_ _

Their meals are out before any of the princesses show up, but the second Cinderella is announced two little heads whip around to catch sight of her. Penny tries to hop up and Chloe has to move quickly to keep her at the table.

“The princesses will come over here to visit us, okay? We just need to wait here,” she explains patiently, and Penny only looks disappointed for a second before she goes back to bouncing excitedly in her chair. Beca can see she’s trying to be on her best behavior, and although she perks up when Belle and Snow White are announced, Penny doesn’t try to leave the table again. When Cinderella finally makes it to their table the girls practically fall out of their chairs scrambling to give her a hug. They too busy to notice when the other princesses make it into the room, so Beca is startled when Penny lets out a high pitched shriek.

“Oh my god Penny, indoor voice!” Chloe hisses, but Penny is not paying attention in the _slightest_.

“Mom! Oh my gosh, mommy, look, it’s Ariel! She’s your favorite! She has to come over here and say hi!” Penny cries loudly, and Beca shrinks down in her seat when she feels a dozen pairs of eyes - including the aforementioned Ariel - land on them.

“Yeah, baby, she’ll be over here in a few minutes, we just have to be patient, remember?”

Ariel is laughing when she finally arrives at their table, and after she greets the girls she turns to Chloe.

“So, I hear I’m a favorite of yours.”  She grins, and Chloe _grins_ back, and oh fuck -

“I’m a little more of an Elsa fan myself, but mom right there definitely wants a hug from you,” she says, nodding across the table to Beca.

“Mama likes Elsa, like me, but you’re mommy’s favorite princess. She says she’s ‘partial to redheads’,” Alice informs Ariel, and Beca feels herself turning fire engine red as Chloe cackles.

“I can see why, what beautiful hair you have!” Ariel directs the compliment at Penny, and Penny beams. The ends of her hack job are sticking out from under her hat again, and Beca _knows_ that they’re going to have to get rid of all their scissors now that a princess has complimented Penny’s self-haircut. They take a few pictures and Chloe keeps making suggestive comments while she forces Beca to pose with the princess, who has an amused glint in her eyes.

“I didn’t embarrass you with Elsa!” Beca complains when Ariel finally departs for the next table, and Chloe shrugs unrepentantly.

“Yeah and you missed out, babe. Not my fault. Oh my god, look at how red you are!” Chloe shows Beca the picture and she feels herself flushing even more, if that’s possible.

 

 

It takes some convincing, despite all the princesses being long gone, to drag the girls out of the restaurant. Alice is sure if they wait long enough the princesses will come back, and Penny is ready to lead a revolt at any given second anyway. It’s the glare the hostess starts leveling at them after the first hour that prods Beca into getting the girls out no matter the cost. In an effort to atone for the trauma of making the girls abandon the princesses, they end up at the carousel _again_ , and honestly if Beca has to hear that twinkly music again she’s going to lose her mind.

So they go stand in line for an hour for the Cars ride. Family vacations are a _great_ idea.

 

“Of course Penny would betray me by not needing a nap today.”

“Aw, do you need a nap Becs?”

“I am _dying_ , Chloe.”

“Well, we’re not staying for the parade again today.”

“Oh thank fuck.”

“Do you - oh my god Penny, get down from there right now!”

 

“Okay ladies, here’s the deal.” Two pairs of wide blue eyes blink innocently up at Beca. “If you get changed into your pajamas and get your teeth brushed super fast, you can run down and ride the Ariel ride again before we go. Capiche?”

The girls shriek in wordless excitement and start ripping their clothes off, which is - honestly Beca just wants them to say “capiche” in agreement. They’ll work on the response.

They do manage to get changed quickly enough, and Beca draws the metaphorical short straw for taking the girls back into the park while Chloe gets their stuff loaded in the car. Luckily it’s late enough that all the other families must be getting their kids ready for bed too, so there’s almost no wait. They ride it once and then Chloe shows up, and they may as well do one last ride as a family before they go. Penny snuggles into Beca’s side as the ride starts, uncharacteristically chill due to exhaustion, and she can see her eyes open wide in amazement despite the fact that this is literally the sixth time they’ve been on this ride today. Beca can sort of appreciate that, because this must be pretty mind-blowing for a three year old.

Mind-blowing enough that Penny and Alice are - to put it lightly - not thrilled about leaving, and there are tears when they get in the car. But as expected, they’re fast asleep in their car seats by the time they’re ten minutes down the road.

“Now we just have to carry them inside and drop them in their beds when we get home. Awes,” Chloe says, taking a few seconds to force Beca to give her a fist bump.

“Please focus on the road, Chloe.”

“Spoilsport.”

“Can I take a nap?”

“Nope, you’re navigator.”

“We’re like forty five minutes from home, Chlo. I’m so _tired_.”

“Did our little vacation wear you out, Becs?” Chloe teases.

“I feel like I could literally die from exhaustion right now,” she responds, and Chloe laughs. “Honestly, that was fun, and the girls were so cute I almost couldn’t handle it, but also we are not repeating that experience for at least two years.”

“One year, but we go for day trips?” Chloe barters, and Beca sighs.

“You already got annual passes lined up, didn’t you?”

“Mmhmm,” Chloe grins, unrepentant.

“This is going to be an annual birthday thing, isn’t it?”

“As long as we’re in L.A., yep.”

“Fine. As long as I get to sleep in tomorrow morning.”

“Penny’s the wild card there, but I’ll try. Pleasure doing business with you, Mrs. Mitchell.”

“Oh my god, I’m taking a nap.”

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to join me in my trashcan at gohandinhand.tumblr.com!


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